Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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