when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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