I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
why do cheetos always look like penises
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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