Quick, to the slutcave!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
