my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
