It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
