i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
