Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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