This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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