I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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