you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize