he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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