Where is the hickey?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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