I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize