I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
