I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
