Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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