dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
