I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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