did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
