If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize