Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
