Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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