honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
