My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
