I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize