is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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