I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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