Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize