Rock
Scissors
Fuck
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
