just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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