Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize