Do you still have your period?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
