my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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