Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
