got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
