Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
