good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize