Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
