OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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