Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
