She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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