I'm drive I can fine osifer
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
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