i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i came on her dog
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
