a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
