so explain again why im purple
no
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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