Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
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