i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize