I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
