As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
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