No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
